The Paradox of Quality - or - Why I Don't Want To Go To Work Today

I do not want to go to work today. It is half-past midnight and I have awoken from a dead sleep to come downstairs to write this note. I do not want to go to work today. As I have stated before, I love teaching, but I do not want to teach today.

These feelings are not directed toward my students. My class is full of eager beavers that want nothing more than to get the education for which they are paying dearly (almost $13,000 US). I do believe that some of my students would sacrifice their own egos just to get a good grade from the process. It is difficult for my students because I warn them that getting an "A" is not the ultimate goal. My standards are much more demanding. I want my students to succeed at learning... and if they get an "A" that is alraight as well. I don't want to push through a class of grade chasers. Being in the medical field requires more than just being smart enough to pass the test. Ultimately my students will have to pass the test of whether or not they can relate to people who are sick, afraid, confused and worried. In my efforts as a teacher I have to give them the knowledge, skills and abilities that are needed, but more importantly I have to give them the sense of compassion, empathy and understanding that will be needed when they work with someone who has just been diagnosed with AIDS, cancer, Alzheimer's or some other scourge of being human.

But I do not want to go to work today. My bosses are sell outs. They have allowed corporate morons who do not understand the purpose, function, process or value of education to make poor choices and implement assinine decisions. Corporate has held out a product with the promise of quality. The advertisements clearly clarion the quality of the experience at our facility. The sales pitch given while showing the potential student the programs includes such words as "quality," "state of the art equipment," "individualized attention," "small class size," and "caring faculty and staff." How is it then that the way corporate operates makes me feel ashamed of my role in the corporate entity? Why do I feel like I was asked to lie to my students this past Friday (and many other days)?

It is clear to me that the only thing that matters to my bosses is the job... not doing the job well... just doing the job as dictated by corporate. The only thing that matters to corporate are the numbers: numbers of enrollees; numbers that pass the financial aid process; numbers that can pay their monthly balances; numbers that pass each course; numbers that remain enrolled; numbers that graduate... and ultimately the number of dollars flowing into the owners' pockets.
When did we throw out the idea that there was an obligation to care about quality of the service, quality of the experience and quality of the education? When did our society abandon the values that "made America great"? What happened to the value espoused by my father and my grandparents: "If a job is worth doing it is worth doing right." Why have we sacrificed our basic value of the RELATIONSHIP between customer and provider? Why is it we can just arbitrarily throw out any semblance of caring about the product, service or experience in favor of making the almighty buck? Can a teacher afford to throw out basic values so that someone makes a buck?

Doesn't all of the world's sacred literature call for a teacher to be held to a higher standard? Isn't it "haram" (unholy) for a teacher to put profit above the responsibility of genuinely teaching a discipline or knowledge?

I love teaching because I impact the world through doing my teaching well. It is not a great impact. Sometimes it is very small indeed. Sometimes I feel the greatest when I am doing the least of what I do... merely affirming the value of a student who is experiencing anxiety, self-doubt, fear of failure, fear of success, or the overwhelming feeling of time and social forces rushing by like a thunderous current of floodwaters.

I do not teach for myself. There may have been a time early in my career that I did not understand that reality. I was young and inexperienced then. But even then the hand of God kept me from teaching strictly for myself. I teach because teaching is my way... my path to God. Teaching is a humbling experience in many ways. It is a process that demands sacrifice and hard work. It requires the teacher to be strong enough to take angry remarks and emotions in one moment, and stronger still to find the time and energy to help that very same student despite the anger and outbursts experienced.

But I do not feel much like a teacher today. Moreover, I feel like a puppet on a string that will dance to the tune played by those that "own" the company for which I work. I fully realize that they own the resources by which I teach... but somehow I can't help but assess that they do not profit except by the service I provide inside the facilty provided by them. The classroom isn't a classroom unless students are learning within it. A school is only as good as the quality of students it produces. Good students are only produced by a process that is committed to the students.

There is a peculiar paradox here... if we committed ourselves to quality at our workplace, then the money would come rolling on in. I don't say this without support. Tom Peters talks about this paradox in every book on quality and excellence he has ever written. The Bible speaks to providing quality in our work and commitment in our service to others. Deming spoke to the issue of quality being a driving force for profit as well as service.

Why is it my bosses have devalued the very values that would make them richer... and better serve the students enrolled at our campus?